DANCING AT THE BLUE IGUANA

MIRACLE COMMUNICATIONS

RELEASED 21 June 2002

Set in a Los Angeles strip club, ‘Dancing at the Blue Iguana’ follows five dancers over the course of a week. Angel (Daryl Hannah, admittedly fit, but not very sexy) is attempting to qualify as an adoptive mother, which is unlikey seeing as she makes Pamela Anderson come across as a modern-day Einstein. Jasmine is a secret poet scared of sharing her talent with anyone, Jo (Jennifer Tilly) is pregnant, Stormy faces a face from the past, and newcomer Jesse has an abusive boyfriend. Oh yes, and there’s a Russian hitman wandering in and out of the film as well. Don’t ask!

And that’s it really. The characters are complete cliches, and it’s not surprising when you know that the script actually came from the minds of the actors themselves after five weeks of improvisation together. These are actors, not writers. The end result must have been predictable to everyone but those involved.

Admittedly, the film does have one thing on it’s side. Plenty of tits and ass! No, seriously, that’s no reason to see this film. If you want T&A, look no further than 1995’s box-office bomb ‘Showgirls’. At least it was funny.

This all goes on for two hours as well! What kind of torture is this? To end on, the most surprising aspect of this slag of a movie is it’s director - British-born Michael Radford. He directed the hit foreign film ‘il Postino’. Too much freedom methinks.

ONE OUT OF FIVE