Three bootlegging brothers. The American Dream. Prohibition. Power. Tom Hardy. Jessica Chastain. Guy Pearce. Gary Oldman. Mia Wasikowska. Er, Shia LaBeouf… it was going so well….

Take no notice of what the film critics say – Madagascar 3 is the one they all really want to see. They might like to ramble on about the merits of Haneke, Gondry or Cronenberg, but all they really want are some zoo animals performing zany antics. They may have banned this stuff in the circus, but it’s still allowed in cinemas.

Gondry himself has described ‘The We and The I’ as the story of a bus ride home at the end of school:

It’s to explore the phenomenon of people, how different they are in groups and large numbers, and how they become more interesting and complex when they are in smaller groups. As they leave the school and do the journey to the last stop, the kids go off the bus gradually. You’ve got 35 and they end up with two. You feel the dynamic changing.

Working with a cast of unknowns, internet rumours of time-travel or sci-fi elements seem unlikely this time out.

I was kind of a loner when I was at school, I was hanging with the girls mostly, not the boys. I couldn’t understand why the boys were so stupid when they were in groups and why they would allow themselves to be so mean to each other. This movie is talking about that.

With ‘The We and the I’ opening the Directors’ Fortnight next month, we’re going to know a whole lot more later today.

Moonrise Kingdom stars Bruce Willis, Edward Norton, Bill Murray, Frances McDormand and Tilda Swinton. Set on an island off the coast of New England in the 1960s, as a young boy and girl fall in love they are moved to run away together. Various factions of the town mobilize to search for them and the town is turned upside down – which might not be such a bad thing.

Two UK premieres share top billing, with the Kristin Stewart-starring ‘On the Road’ being one, and John Hillcoat’s (‘The Proposition’) ‘Lawless’ being the other. Oh, and there’s the new Ben Stiller comedy ‘The Watch’ (formerly ‘Neighborhood Watch’).

Otherwise it’s the usual bag of ancient classics (‘The Bicycle Thieves’, ‘The Birds’, which is the brand new remastered print), geek classics (‘Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom’, ‘Pretty in Pink’), cult classics (‘Boogie Nights’, ‘Paris, Texas’) and bona-fide classics (well, one in the form of ‘Apocalypse Now’). Why the fuck ‘Enter the Void’ is playing is anyone’s guess…

Tickets will be priced at £14.50 for single screenings, £18 for double-bills, and £22.50 for premieres, with all prices subject to an additional booking fee.

Doors open at 18:30, followed shortly after by a DJ at 19:00, with the film kicking off at 21:00 each night.

Here’s the full line-up – tickets are on sale NOW.

UK Premiere: On the Road (Cert TBC)
Thursday 16 August 2012

The Birds (15)
Friday 17 August 2012

Enter the Void (18) plus Chemical Brothers: Don’t Think (PG)
Saturday 18 August 2012

People’s Premiere: The Watch (Cert TBC)
Sunday 19 August 2012

Apocalypse Now (18)
Monday 20 August 2012

Bicycle Thieves (U)
Tuesday 21 August 2012

Paris, Texas (12)
Wednesday 22 August 2012

Pretty in Pink (15)
Thursday 23 August 2012

Boogie Nights (18) plus Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (18)
Friday 24 August 2012

Sexy Beast (18) plus Drive (18)
Saturday 25 August 2012

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (PG)
Sunday 26 August 2012

UK Premiere: Lawless (Cert TBC)
Monday 27 August 2012

‘The Raid’ isn’t out ’til next Friday (18th May in the UK), but here’s the UK trailer to whet your appetite. Film Chronicles have seen the finished movie, and it features some of the most intense and impressive fighting choreography ever seen on screen. It’s also a stylish debut from Brit director Gareth Evans, and dare I say it, his style reminded me of a certain Mr Christopher Nolan.

Come Friday 18th, prepare for an ass-spanking.

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Judging from this teaser video, the next Secret Cinema promises to be something futuristic.

Maybe ‘Alien’? Done that. Perhaps ‘Blade Runner’? Done that. What about ‘Brazil’? Could be, as it’s the only big, modern sci-fi classic the SC team haven’t tackled yet.

Well what about taking the Brave New Ventures tagline at face value, and entertaining the possibility that this Secret Cinema event won’t actually feature a classic movie, but one which hasn’t been released yet. One which is about a Brave New Venture to a distant planet, in search of man’s beginnings. A film which, co-incidentally, opens nationwide in the UK on June 1st, the same date that the new Secret Cinema event begins at a secret London location. Ladies and gentlemen, I suggest that the new Secret Cinema event will be based around Ridley Scott’s HUGELY anticipated return to the ‘Alien’ universe, ‘Prometheus’. If it isn’t, I’ll eat my space helmet.

I should clarify that I have no evidence to support this, other than the dates aligning, the wordplay suggesting so (a ‘secret expedition’, and company president Mr Uys Van Welevelt sounds very much like an anagram (it isn’t quite) of ‘Alien’ company Weyland-Yutani) and that Ridley Scott personally recorded an introductory message for previous Secret Cinema gig ‘Alien’, so there’s history too. All will be revealed soon, but I’d nab yourself a couple of those tickets today if I was you, as it’s likely to be something pretty special.

PLEASE NOTE: THE FOLLOWING REVIEW IS A COMPLETE, SPOILER-FILLED REVIEW OF THE FILM (hey, it came out in 1995, whaddaya mean you were watching ‘Ace Ventura’?)

A plane flies over a huge dam.

A bungee jump of 722 feet.

Bond just gets his gun out before disappearing behind the rocks. I bet the stuntman got a bonus for that.

So, Russia. Is it too much to ask for a General Gogol cameo?

Blue laser. Very Bond. It actually looks quite authentic.

Ah, the eyes. Our first glimpse of the ‘new man’.

Pierce Brosnan’s first lines as Bond. Spoken, upside down, to a Russian soldier who’s sitting on the bog. I’ll bet Brosnan never envisaged that.

Now why couldn’t THIS shot have been the first time anybody saw me?

Look at this. It’s BOND everybody. Bond is back! And director Martin Campbell is making Brosnan look ohhh-so good.

Yay, Bond bumps into 006 – Sean Bean! (okay, Alec Trevelyan).

‘James. For England.’

Blue eyes. Keep those close-ups coming, Martin.

Having Sean Bean as a 00-agent is like having TWO James Bonds at once. It’s sniper-barrel-tastic!

Now that’s a set that’s screaming ‘blow me up!’

Just LOOK at this double-act. Bond and Trevelyan. Brom’homme and Sheffield Steel.

Ruskies *groan* again.

‘Closing time, James. Last call.’

‘Buy me a pint.’

‘Shut the door Alec, there’s a draught.’ Looks like 006’s head is about to get a bit draughty.

006’s cold-blooded murder puts Brosnan into ‘rage mode’. Never could have done this with Roger Moore – he could only do ‘age mode.’

007 disguises himself as a shopping trolley.

Cheese. Baked beans. Crisps. Where’s the flipping bread aisle?

Russian supermarket store detectives operate a zero-tolerance policy.

It’s like a theatre performance, only the audience has Kalashnikovs and the lead actor is a silver wheely bin. A bit like ‘Britain’s Got Talent’.

Bond spots the weak point in the room, and the soldiers get rained on by silver gas cylinders.

Down the chute into the open air.

More close-ups of our hero, just in case you forgot how bloody good he looks.

Brosnan runs better than any other Bond I think. Although his style looks a bit ‘wasteful’ (he swings those arms around), it does look agressive and urgent. His face gets a fantastic ‘determined’ look too, as if there’s no way he’s not going to reach his goal.

A lovely matte shot, so you can see exactly what’s going on. I’ve captioned it just to make things clearer.

After some ‘manly’ running, Bond has reached the cockpit. No pithy ‘I believe this is your stop’ lines or such nonsense. Brosnan just wrestles the pilot out of the plane.

Which now means he has to catch the pilot-less plane, on a motorbike he’s knocked someone off of. Dramatic stunt follows.

Somehow, Bond is falling faster than a plane. I thought the laws of physics state that all objects in free fall accelerate at the same rate, as noted by Galileo. Hmmm.. Bond writers taking licence with the laws of physics – never.

This bit is stoopid. Looks good though.

That is the face of a man attempting to pull a plane up from free-fall. Remember it just in case you ever find yourself in a similar situation.

The limey bastard did it.

The Russian base explodes in Supermarionation.

OPENING CREDITS

Okay, as if that opening sequence wasn’t cool enough (and it must be as I’ve snapped about a billion pictures so far, a new Film Chronicles Blogalongabond record), we now get the opening credits. Respect to the late Maurice Binder, without whom these credit sequences wouldn’t exist, but ‘Goldeneye’ has the best opening credits sequence so far. Designed by Daniel Kleinman, accompanied by the warblings of Tina Turner (written by The Edge and Bono), it’s supremely superior to anything that’s gone before. In the time-honoured tradition, I believe a photo (or five hundred) speak louder than a thousand words, so here’s the brilliant imagery condensed down.

THE Aston Martin is back! Director Martin Campbell hasn’t put a foot wrong yet.

‘James, is it really necessary to drive quite so fast?’ asks Caroline (Serena Gordon), who’s an MI6 field operative evaluator (ie 00-agent sex toy).

Such a shame. Any thoughts that Goldeneye might be a down-the-line perfect Bond film are shattered by the audio fart-squeaks emanating from the soundtrack. New boy Eric Serra, who’s bom b-b-bom bom bom-bom opening music is so very, very good, utterly drops the baton with the worst piece of synth garbage in ANY film, never mind Bond, ever! Arrgh, I actually have trouble watching this scene because of the music. Which is MENTAL, because it’s a great scene! I want a ‘Goldeneye’ special edition with David Arnold wiping this monstrosity from memory and placing something perhaps reminiscent of ‘Goldfinger’ (ergo the car) in place of it. Wouldn’t that be great?

Shit-eating grin – check.

‘Who’s that?’

‘The next girl.’

The lady driving the red Ferrari Spider F355 GTS looks quite scary.

Poor Caroline obviously hasn’t been in the company of 00-agents much.

Bond stops the car at Caroline’s insistence, and of course the old charmer has some ice-cold bubbly on hand.

Less than seventeen minutes into the movie, and he’s lost a friend, blown up the Russians, driven the Aston, and scored. Brosnan is off to a winner.

Baccarat in Monaco. Bond takes on ‘the next girl’ (smoking an ugly-ass cigar).

Bond.
James Bond.

Xenia Onnatop.

Onnatop.

Pierce tries some ‘punning’, saying how he used to ‘drop in’ occasionally to Russia. ‘Shoot in and out’. ‘I like a woman who enjoys pulling rank.’

Bond checks his printer read-out in the car, with Moneypenny detailing that Xenia is an ex-fighter pilot. Suspected links to the Janus Crime Syndicate, St. Petersberg.

‘M’ authorises Bond to ‘observe’ Onnatop, but strictly no ‘contact’ without prior approval. ie keep it in your pants, 007.

Xenia and the Admiral she’s picked up are having what is known as ‘vigorous’ sex.

So much so that the Admiral can’t actually breathe, which certainly does it for a screeching Xenia.

Oh, and someone in the foreground pinches the Admiral’s ID card.

Next morning, and Bond does a little snooping on the Manticore boat, from which the Admiral and Xenia have just departed, heading to the demonstration of a new helicopter on the Navy ship.

The Admiral falls out of the cupboard, an orgasmic grin still imprinted on his face!

‘What you are about to see is the first working prototype of the Tiger helicopter – the only helicopter to be hardened against all forms of electronic interference, radio jamming, and electromagnetic radiation.’

The pilots are offered a quick treat before the get in their ‘chopper’.

The boys are flying to the spirit in the sky today.

Bond tries to stop the helicopter taking off, but Xenia and her co-pilot are on their way.

Boris Grishenko (Alan Cumming) and Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco)

‘I am invincible!’ states FBI-hacking geek Boris, defeating their powerful 56k modem.

Boris goes for a cigarette. With an ulterior motive.

Here come the shitstorm.

Grunt hands over the Goldeneye key.

Xenia hands over some lead, looking like she’s stepped out of an 80’s Duran Duran video.

Lots of dead Russian computer spods. Xenia appears to be enjoying a certain ‘sexual’ satisfaction again as the harbinger of death.

The weapon is armed, target Severnaya. Ooh, a space laser. Haven’t seen one of those for a while.

MI6. After all those years of working undercover of ‘Universal Exports’, the Bond filmmakers finally feel comfortable revealing the UK’s secret agents’ HQ.

‘Moneypenny, what would I ever do without you?’ Samantha Bond gets to say something Lois Maxwell never did. ‘As far as I can remember, James, you’ve never had me…’

‘M’ (Judi Dench), or the ‘evil queen of numbers’, as Bill Tanner (Michael Kitchen) has unfortunately just referred to her. Did you know Judi Dench’s character had a name? Barbara Mawdsley. No, neither did I.

She instantly puts him down by stating if she ‘wants sarcasm, she’ll talk to her children, thank you very much.’ Ouch.

Here come the MIGs.

Goldeneye zaps Severnaya, and Natalia leaps for cover as everything goes electric blue.

Seemingly stuck in the pulverised command centre, Natalia has a stroke of luck as the roof falls in and she’s able to climb out.

Back at MI6, they’re all getting very concerned about ‘Goldeneye’, after seeing the damage it’s done on their spy satellites.

‘Lady’ ‘M’ (ooo, controversial) has a very modern, swish office. Gone are the fusty, green and red leather rooms of old.

‘You don’t like me, Bond. You don’t like my methods. You think I’m more interested in my numbers than your instincts.’

‘The thought had occured to me.’

‘Good, because I think you’re a sexist, misogynist dinosaur. A relic of the Cold War. Whose boyish charms, though wasted on me, obviously appealed to that young woman I sent out to evaluate you.’

Just to show she’s not totally cold-hearted, ‘Bond. Come back alive.’

St Petersburg, Russia.

The Russians await General Arkady Grigorovich Ourumov’s (Gottfried John) report.

The General is visibly shaken to discover there were two survivors of the Svernaya incident. Boris he knew about, but not level 2 programmer Natalia.

‘Morning ‘Q’.

Ugh, new car. The blue BMW Z3 roadster convertible. Tacky.

BT test out their new ‘unfriendly’ telephone box.

‘Don’t touch that! It’s my lunch.’

Bond in St Petersburg.

What the hell is ‘Whitaker’ (‘The Living Daylights’, 1987) doing here?

Ah, it’s okay. Joe Don Baker is playing CIA agent Jack Wade… with an unusual identifying tattoo on his hip. ‘Muffy – third wife.’

Boris is back online.

So is Natalya. ‘Goldeneye’ has turned into a chatroom snoozefest.

Natalya has agreed to meet Boris in a church.

Oh. Orgasmatronic-deathbitch is here too. That’s not good.

‘Walter PPK. 7.65mm, only three men I know use such a gun. I believe I have killed two of them.’ Bond meets Valentin Zikorsky (Robbie Coltrane).

Yes, that’s Minnie Driver, in Valentin’s club as a country and western singer. One of Bond history’s more bizarre moments.

Bond once shot ex-KGB agent Valentin (and now criminal) in the knee. Valentin threatens worse – one bullet either side of Bond, and then aims straight at 007’s genitals. Bond quickly talks.

Valentin reveals that ‘Janus’ (who he has never met) is a Lienz Cossack, who surrendered to the Allies at the end of WWII, only for the British to betray them and send them back to Stalin, where they were all shot.

‘Not exactly our finest hour.’

Bond is spending his evening with a relaxing swim.

Of course he always has his PPK tucked into his towel.

This could be interesting…

Bond’s a bit worried this sex isn’t so safe.

‘No, no, no. No more foreplay.’

Onnatopp takes Bond to a deserted graveyard where the Tiger Helicoper is parked.

‘Hello James.’ ‘Alec?’ ‘Back from the dead.’

After a little speech about how much he hates the British government for killing his family, Alec Trevalyn leaves Bond and Natalya tied up in the helicopter, about to be blown to smithereens.

In a classic 90’s ‘escaping-from-the-explosion-by-going-up-faster’ moment (copyright ‘Die Hard 2’), Bond and Natalya survive after 007 hits the ejector button with his head.

No sooner do they land, and our heroic couple are taken away by General Orumov’s troops.

Bond and Natalya get to know each other.

Natalya tells Mishkin all about Orumov’s little Svernaya adventure. Orumov enters, rather stressed.

Knocking Orumov to the floor, James and Natalya escape, with 007 spraying his Kalashnikov gunfire all over the place.

More action in the archive.

Pierce Brosnan jumps out of a window! No, I’m kidding, that’s a stuntman. Dalton would have done it.

Natalya has been captured by Orumov, so Bond is on his own.

Hmmm, looking for an escape route…

Bond smashes a tank through the wall. Bond smash!

Natalya and Orumov put on their best WTF faces.

Brosnan’s tank-driving face.

In pursuit, it doesn’t matter about width barriers.

Still chasing, doing handbrake turns…

How do explain that to your insurance company?

So you’re telling me it’s technically a write-off?

Bond picks up a statue. This is like a kids games of cars.

Ah, the Brosnan ‘tie-straighten’. This is the practice run. Look for Brosnan to perfect the move in a few years time.

Smoking like a train. I mean, by a train.

Roger would have said ‘looks like I have a train to catch.’ Brosnan just works out his next plan of action, which probably involves smashing something or blowing shit up.

‘You know, James and I shared everything.’

Bond has his tank positioned in front of the oncoming train. ‘Bond, only Bond.’

Bond’s on the train and the first one to act.

007 saves Natalya and shoots Orumov, but Trevelyan and Onnatop escape via this helicopter that rises out of the derailed train.

Great explosion, and no trace of any green-screen / blue-screen / rear projection nonsense.

Bond and Natalya talk ‘standard operating procedures.’

The Carribean, and some much-needed vacation time. Hold on, isn’t there a global terrorist on the loose? Ah, that can wait, let’s recharge those batteries first.

Wade drops in, with some goodies from ‘T, Z, what’s his name?’ ‘Q’. He’s here to help 007 and Natalya get into Cuba. Joe Don Baker is good value for money in ‘Goldeneye’, totally making up for his horrible performance in ‘The Living Daylights’. He’s lively, funny, and flippant. Representative of the script in general, really.

The arty shot. I’ve said it before, every Bond film has one.

No time for love, Dr Jones.

Flying around over Cuba, looking for version 2.0 of the Severnaya dish. It doesn’t appear to be here…

A missile flies out of the lake (?) and takes Bond’s plane down.

Bond and Natalya pass out after escaping from the plane wreckage. I’d say he probably hasn’t had enough rest lately. No sex before a fight, Bond!

Onnatop drops in to give 007 a good kicking.

I’m not sure you can actually squeeze someone to death with your thighs like this, but I’m willing to suspend belief. Brosnan certainly plays a man in pain very well.

This is the face of someone who’s just about to be dragged up into a tree at speed and crushed.

‘She always did enjoy a good squeeze.’

The fabulous villain’s lair, probably better known to an entire generation because of it’s use in the ‘Goldeneye’ N64 game.

Trevelyan and Boh-reese.

Ahh, the dish was hiding underneath the lake.

Bond and Natalya slide down the dish, and avoid falling down the world’s biggest plughole.

As 007 arms a sticky mine, Pierce Brosnan shows his unflappable side.

Bond is captured, not before he’s planted some explosives and Natalya is hacking into the mainframe computer.

Trevelyan checks out 007’s latest watch next to his own. Omega get a two-product-placements-for-one deal!

Trevelyan threatens to shoot Bond unless Natalya gives up the new access codes to Goldeneye, but Boris insists he can do it himself, all the while double-clicking an explosive pen that Bond has brought in to the mix.

Boris decides he can’t do it, and gets a bit cross, waving his pen at Natalya – which is now primed to explode.

All hell breaks loose.

I’d go for a headshot. You know, better stats and all that.

Bond runs up a very long bridge, with the aim of destroying the transmitter tower.

Here’s a bit of that fine Brosnan sprinting technique.

Trevelyan is in pursuit, displaying poor marksmanship skills for a former 00-agent.

Awesome jump-and-roll stunt down the stairs.

‘Goldeneye’ must have the most ‘Bond close-ups’ of any film. There’s virtually one every few minutes.

006 vs. 007

Game over?

Bond kicks open an escape ladder, and feels the pain as it stops it’s descent.

Nowhere left to run.

006 plays ‘footsie’ with 007.

This reminds me of hanging onto the bottom of Cloud City…

Bond’s certainly being put through the ringer today.

One last summon of strength, and 007 kicks Trevelyan off the edge, grabbing his boot just in time.

Despite the fall, Trevelyan is still just alive. If the transmitter tower were to explode and fall on him, that might do it…

A leap of faith.

Boom bang-a-bang bang.

Liquid Nitrogen Boris. Not quite as invincible as he thought.

‘James, James, are you alright?’

Wade and his team of ‘scarecrows’ turn up just as the danger’s passed.

FINAL LINE
‘Darling, what could possibly go wrong, hey?’

FINAL THOUGHTS

Where to begin? ‘Goldeneye’ gives Bond the biggest kick up the arse he’s ever had, dragging the franchise into the 21st century (okay, I know it’s five years early, but figuratively speaking). Even though Timothy Dalton was a great Bond, the films were still running on automatic during his tenure, and it needed this six year break for much of the production team to have moved on or died. ‘Goldeneye’ embraces the concept of Bond as an outdated dinosaur, and is quite open about it. However, that doesn’t stop us from enjoying another action extravaganza while we laugh along as 007 gets the piss taken out of him by bloody Robbie Coltrane.

The script is a cracker, with endlessly quotable lines. Martin Campbell does such a bang-up job of directing that (A) he was invited back to reboot the series again in 2006 and (B) it’s bemusing that he’s never produced other action classics, apart from the entertaining first ‘Zorro’ movie.

The opening sequence is one of the best, and no-one ever forgets that bungee jump. The theme song is one of the best, and Pierce Brosnan shows such promise in the role that it seemed likely he would become the definitive Bond (sadly, the films to come do him no favours, but we’ll come to that). Sean Bean is an ace baddie, and even better, Famke Janssen trumps everyone with her death-gasmic screeching. And of course, Judi Dench. Dench IS ‘M’. She’s so good that when they reboot the series in 2006, she’s the only element that doesn’t get thrown out, that’s how good she is. Her casting is what’s called a ‘masterstroke.’ Dench very much brings Bond down a peg or two, allowing him to build himself back up in our minds with daring exploits. That’s not to mention the new ‘Moneypenny’ who basically theatens Bond with sexual discrimination.

It’s not quite perfect (BMW and Eric Serra wouldn’t be missed) but the modern incarnation of James Bond can clearly be traced back to 1995, as opposed to anything before. In 1995, James Bond most certainly did return, and his profile has only grown ever since.

THE END of GOLDENEYE – James Bond will return in TOMORROW NEVER DIES

RATING
006 out of 007

‘American Pie’ is one of the defining movies of the ‘90s’. Released in ‘99, it still holds up now (in 2012) as a superb teen comedy with a heart of gold. Much like the ‘Scream’ series (which got off to an earlier start in ‘96), the first one of each series is classic small budget movie-making resulting in huge mainstream success. Unlike ‘Scream’s superior (or is it?) sequel, ‘American Pie 2’ pretty much regurgitates the first movie only with less impact. ‘American Wedding’, the third entry, is almost unrecognisable in many ways from the first movie. Main characters are nowhere to be seen, bit-part characters are now the leads, and Stifler (Seann William Scott) is in nearly every scene, NOT to the movie’s benefit. If ever I’ve seen a movie series with no future and in need of putting down, then the ‘American Pie’ series hit that moment in 2003.

So it’s quite a surprise to see the ‘American Pie’ franchise back in cinemas. Written by ‘Harold and Kumar’ creators Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg (who I imagine know how to write Jewish characters!), Jim Levenstein (Jason Biggs) and Michelle (Alyson Hannigan) are still married, though with a bouncing two-year-old boy, they’re not as happy as they’d like, finding time for each other difficult and mourning the loss of their sex life. Returning to East Great Falls to visit Jim’s dad and attend a high school reunion, it’s not long before the old gang are getting into new, embarassing situations, often of a sexual basis. Get ready to party with Oz (Chris Klein), Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas), Vicky (Tara Reid), Steve Stifler (Seann William Scott), Heather (Mena Suvari), Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas), Jim’s Dad (Eugene Levy), Stifler’s Mom (Jennifer Coolidge), and even MILF Guy #2 (John Cho) all over again. MILF! MILF! MILF!

I found ‘American Reunion’ to be genuinely funny and warm-hearted, just like the first movie. It’s not as good as the first movie (too long, reliant on borrowed ideas) but it does feel like you’re back in exactly the same East Great Falls universe, and if you have affection for those characters, then you’ll just be happy to be a part of their lives again for two hours. What I really liked about the film was how each character got their fair share of screentime, with no-one’s story left feeling undeveloped. So what if it all feels predictable? For those of you who liked these sweet kids back in 1999, you’ll find this tale slightly more bittersweet.

Amongst the many storylines, a couple of new characters even manage to break-out, Jim’s now-grown-up babysitting charge Kara (Ali Cobrin) and previously-unseen class-of-’99 frump Selena (Dania Ramirez). There’s even an inspired cameo from a moderately-famous actress towards the end.

What ‘American Reunion’ does best is burst the bubble that middle-aged people are still able (or really want to) party like they did when they were teenagers. None of the main characters are entirely happy with their lives, but they realise that at least they’ve grown up, and life offers them things they didn’t have when they were eighteen. Apart from Stifler, who’s still on a one-man mission to raise hell wherever possible!

I doubt there’ll be another ‘American Pie’ outing, as ‘Reunion’ pretty much puts a lid on the characters lives (and the box office hasn’t gotten close to the original movies). In my opinion, that’s a good thing as I don’t want to see another one. But if it HAD to happen, my idea for a sequel would be to return to the characters in eighteen years, with their offspring now looking to lose their virginities. ‘American Pie: The Next Generation’. I won’t hold my breath.

THREE OUT OF FIVE

SUITS

The offical line goes like this:

Even the best lawyer in New York City can use some help.

Proving to be an irrepressible duo and invaluable to the practice, Mike and Harvey must keep their secret from everyone including managing partner Jessica (Gina Torres) and Harvey’s arch nemesis Louis (Rick Hoffman), who seems intent on making Mike’s life as difficult as possible.

That’s pretty much what happens in the double-length pilot episode, with a further eleven episodes to follow (and a second season starts in the US soon). So what’s the critcial line?

Well, ‘Suits’ seems to be a show that is smart enough to burrow it’s own place in the TV schedules. It takes it’s time, it doesn’t fall back on crazy characters or stereotypes, and after watching a few episodes, you’ll find yourself hooked. It won’t go down as the greatest show in television history, but it aims high enough to entertain with filmic stories. The lead duo (Patrick J. Adams and Gabriel Macht) work brilliantly off of each other, and the supporting cast are equally strong.

You can get the whole first season now, here on Amazon.

That’s a great price for some quality TV.